Everything You Think You Know About Dating is Wrong

Recently Loveawake dating site funded a study of singles in America. And with more than 105 million of us (nearly one-third the entire population), there’s a lot to study. 

So they surveyed 5,200 singles aged 21 and up to find out their dating habits. And the results uncovered some things that go against what we thought we new about dating roles. Sure some of the usual Do’s and Don’ts still apply, but it looks like the playing field is definitely leveling out. Here’s some of what they found:

You Thought: Men must always pay on a first date.

Survey Says: While the vast majority of women surveyed said they want men to make the first move and ask them out, 41% said they would offer to pay the bill when it arrives. And 63% of men would let them put down their credit card.

You Thought: If the date isn’t going well, she’ll bail.

Survey Says: 31 percent of both men and women said they can tell very quickly, within the first 15 minutes, if there is any chemistry on a date. But that doesn’t mean if things are headed south she’ll excuse herself to the ladies room and never return. Only 12% said they’d end the date within the first 30 minutes.

You Thought: If she doesn’t like you, she’ll let you know.

Survey Says: Only about half (52%) would “politely” explain that they aren’t interested, and nearly a quarter (24%) would just be evasive about their future availability until you got the hint. And the younger they are, the more likely they would send your calls directly to voicemail and avoid you altogether.

You Thought: Men are expected to make the after-date call.

Survey Says: Less than half the women surveyed (48%) said they expected the man to make the follow up call after the date. The rest were confident enough to pick up the phone themselves. The majority of guys (68%) tend to follow the Swingers rule and only call after one to three days. But 6% can’t wait that long, and will call in under 24 hours.

You Thought: The after-date call can be a text or email.

Survey Says: Maybe. While 64% of the respondents said they would be OK with getting a post-date text, more than 80% said you’d better call instead.

You Thought: First date sex is a possibility.

Survey Says: It may happen, but the chances are slim. Only a small percentage of singles (6.5%), said they regularly have sex after the first date. And a big majority (80%), actually disapprove of having a between-the-sheets night cap.

You Thought: A “friend request” could follow a first date.

Survey Says: Not so fast. About a quarter (26%), of singles ages 21-34 think it’s OK to add a date as a Facebook friend only after 2-3 dates, while 11% of singles from 35-44 think you need to be in an exclusive relationship before adding the friend tag. (When is it OK to start poking? No data, but I’m going to go ahead and say never.)

You Thought: She wants you to meet her friends right away.

Survey Says: Actually, according to the survey, guys are more likely to introduce someone they’re dating to their friends within the first month than women are, regardless of their age group — nearly 50% of men vs. 35% of women. Apparently she’s not as eager to show us off than we are to show her off.

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