There’s no getting around it, we have to interact with people whether we want to or not.
For some of us, having to interact with co-workers or family members is an incredibly uncomfortable experience since at times they can have unsavory, rude or otherwise negative personalities. Having to deal with them can be flat out stressful.
Despite the stress, knowing how to deal with people is paramount. Developing good people skills not only improve your relationship with others but also reduces your frustration from interacting with others. Here are four ways to better relate to just about anyone.
1. Remember We’re All Connected
I’m sure we’ve all heard that we’re all connected before, but have we really taken the time out to understand what that means? Regardless of your religious affiliation or belief system. the notion that all human beings share a connection to one another through our ability to experience similar emotions is undeniable. Though we all are different, none of us are excluded from having experienced joy, pain, and every emotion in between. A wonderful way to remind yourself of how connected we all are is to remember that even the most annoying person you encounter has been hurt by a painful experience, or has felt joy when something wonderful happened, just like you. Recognizing the common ground between you and others helps you better relate to them
2. Don’t Take The Behavior Of Others Personally
No matter how upset or annoyed you get when you have to deal with some people, 9 times out of 10 their behavior has nothing to do with you. Yes, there is the occasional person who lives to annoy, bother and irk your soul, but most difficult people don’t even realize they’re being difficult nor are they being that way because of you. Once you realize this, it is a lot easier to look at their behavior as a reflection of how they feel about themselves, not how they feel about you.
3. Avoid The Urge To Judge
One of the first things most of us do when we think about or talk about people who are difficult to deal with is judge them. They’re crazy, selfish, stupid, too loud, unreliable, pathetic etc. Most times when dealing with people we don’t like we have an internal dialogue going on in our heads. Placing judgment on people puts them beneath us. When you think of someone as beneath you it is hard to see their humanity, to see your connectedness to them. Allow people to be themselves without making them wrong for it.
4. Don’t Make Yourself Wrong For Not Liking Someone
This may sound counterintuitive but one of the easiest ways to get caught up in how difficult we think people are or how much we don’t like them is when we judge ourselves for not liking them. Accepting that not everyone is your cup of tea and that it’s ok not to like everyone actually helps you to better deal with them. What we focus on grows and if you focus on feeling guilty about the way you feel about someone that just brings you more guilt until eventually, you begin to resent the person for making you feel that way. Accept that you don’t like them and focus on steps one through three.